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Archive for the ‘mindset’ Category

Is your inner control freak freaking out?

Wednesday, April 1st, 2020

Are you feeling less in control these days?

Who isn’t?

Like many of you, we are under a “stay-at-home” order. Even if you are not under an order, you are likely practicing “social distancing.”

Along with being “stuck at home” comes feelings of not being in control. It is acutely aware to all of us.

The truth is that we have very little control over things all the time. We just don’t dwell on it on a regular basis. Our brain is focused elsewhere the majority of the time. Right now, our brains tend to go to the lack of control.

And we worry about this lack of control. And we can get carried away with this.

What can you do?



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Everyday lessons

Wednesday, February 5th, 2020

I recently got back from two weeks in Aruba.

I had a lovely time. Sun and sand, good meals, good books, new friends.

Just as each day at home, I was open to any lesson that was waiting for me. Here are four.

Start where you are

One of the things I love about the resort where we stay is its focus on making wellness available. I can choose from 3-4 exercise classes every day. I usually workout in the gym, take a mile walk along the beach and then go to a yoga or stretch class.

The second day I was there I went to a stretch class with Alex. He is a mixed martial artist, and I had taken his class a couple of years earlier.

In fact, I’d been to his very first class.

When I told him this, he said to me, “I’m so much better now.”

That was such a good reminder that you have to start where you are. Don’t compare yourself to others. You will get better or more knowledgeable in good time.



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Money mindset lessons from my dog

Wednesday, January 15th, 2020

I’m sure you realize that your relationship with money is important to your business growth. Seems obvious, right?

And, I know that you had a lot of reasons for starting your business. One of them was to make money at something that you loved.

What is odd is that we want to make money to support our lifestyle and make a contribution. At the same time, we can sabotage our efforts with our mindset. You could also call them “money blocks.”

So what does this have to do with my dog?

Recently our dog Button went through a picky-eater stage. We would end up throwing out partially used cans of food because she would no longer eat them. I found it frustrating “throwing money away.”



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The simple act of choosing a word

Wednesday, December 18th, 2019

Many people choose a “word” as a focus tool for the year. I have been doing this since probably 2005 when Kathy, the owner of the yoga studio where I practiced, passed around a basket with words.

I chose “openness.” At the time I asked if I could pick a different word. After all, the woman next to me chose love, which seemed like a much better word. I remember Kathy telling me that I was stuck with openness because the word had chosen me.

I went home, taped the word onto my computer, and let it be an anchor as I went through the year. Looking back, I know that this made a tremendous difference in my year.



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Can you handle it?

Wednesday, December 4th, 2019

Several weeks back I had a conversation with a colleague about her distress over a poor review of her book on Amazon.

“But I want everyone to love the book,” she said, really meaning, “I want everyone to love me.” She believed that if someone did not like the book, they did not like her.

I think we can all fall into that trap, wanting to be liked. I can remember exactly when I decided I didn’t care if everyone liked me. I was working in the offices of an ad agency, and one of the men in the office told me he didn’t like me.

Well, how could that be? I am truly likable. Then I thought about it and realized that I did not really like him. He had poor work habits, always sloughing his work onto someone else, and I generally did not like being around him. Why did I think I cared anyhow?

It is just not possible to avoid criticism, especially in our social media world. And, hey, it does hurt sometimes. And, you can learn to handle it.

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How confident are you?

Wednesday, November 20th, 2019

When someone asks you how confident you are about something, do you cringe and second-guess or question your abilities? Maybe self-doubt starts to set in. You feel stuck or paralyzed about taking action. You may be even one of those people who end up in a downward spiral to the point of giving up.

I feel confident about a lot of my creative skills. A few Thanksgivings ago, I decided I would make and decorate a cheesecake for dessert with our meal. The impetus came from a friend who made his living in the wedding industry. He had recently retired and shared a recipe.

This recipe was good. So good, in fact, it paid his mortgage payment each and every month. And this cheesecake had a buttercream icing that was piped beautifully. Do I have those skills? Absolutely not. Did I feel a bit intimidated by the task? Definitely. Did self-doubt set in? Of course.

This is a just small situation, but it can play out every day in larger ways. Giving a speech to a large group for the first time or the 10th time. Entering your art in a show. Sharing a portion of your book in public. How did you get from feeling doubt to taking action to building confidence? Here are some ideas.

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Slay that frog!

Wednesday, June 19th, 2019

Do you know the story behind the maxims:

“Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day,” and

“If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning.
And if it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first.”?

These words have been credited to Mark Twain over the years. It does sound like something he’d say. In actuality, the original quote goes back to Nicolas Chamfort, who lived in the 1700s.

Provenance aside, the theory is that if you have difficult tasks, it is best to get them over with.

And, if you have more than one difficult task, tackle the biggest one.

In other words, don’t eat dessert first.



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2018: A Year of Lessons

Wednesday, January 16th, 2019

At the end of a year I like to take a look back at the year and see what I accomplished, what changed in my life, what lessons I learned. I usually do this in a journal. This year I decided to share some of it with you. I’d love to hear what your lessons were.

Don’t be afraid to stop a successful event

In 2010 I stepped out on a limb and decided to create the Creative Arts Business Summit.

I had been to events, knew what supported me, knew what didn’t, and I wanted to create something that would serve creatives to build a successful, sustainable business.

And by successful, I meant what was successful to you. I’d been to events where someone else decided what my success looked like. I didn’t want that.

That first event, known to those who come as CABS, was held in March of 2011. In the ensuing years, 100s of creatives have joined our tribe, shared their stories, and left transformed. They have found a home where they could share from the heart and not be judged. They felt supported, and changed their business and lives.

People who came to CABS left motivated. More importantly, they left with a plan to follow and a support team to back them up.

And, they kept coming back.

I absolutely LOVE CABS. Why would I want to stop doing it?



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Start with Intention

Wednesday, January 2nd, 2019

It’s the start of a New Year. Maybe you spent time creating goals. Maybe you didn’t. Maybe you selected a word of the year or theme to guide you. Maybe you didn’t.

Setting goals and choosing a word to provide focus matter. But what matters even more is that you start each day with intention.

If you look at Webster’s, you can find six definitions for intention. A popular one would be “what one intends to do or bring about.” I prefer the definition that says “a determination to act in a certain way” or “resolve.”

You might even think of intention as the bridge between your words (your goals or theme) and your actions.



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Discover the power of a word!

Wednesday, December 19th, 2018


What’s in a word?

Many people choose a “word” as a focus tool for the year. I have been doing this since probably 2005 when Kathy, the owner of the yoga studio where I practiced, passed around a basket with words.

I chose “openness.” At the time I asked if I could pick a different word. After all, the woman next to me chose love, which seemed like a much better word. I remember Kathy telling me that I was stuck with openness because the word had chosen me.

I went home, taped the word onto my computer, and let it be an anchor as I went through the year. Looking back, I know that this made a tremendous difference in my year.

Read more…

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